Jehovah's Witnesses Straight Talk - Forum/Blog

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Answered by Christophe Bikman Updated Wed

What are some things narcissists say to show they are jealous of you?

From my experience they will attribute any success you have or prosperity to someone else or themselves, even if the statements are totally unfounded. Here’s three examples:

After having a wonderful show opening for my artwork at a Gallery, I sold several pieces and felt really good about myself and my work. My ex wife reminded me that I owed her big time as no one would come to my shows if it weren’t for her networking her friends to make sure I had a good turnout. I immediately felt bad. I also believed her at the time. In hindsight, yes a handful of her friends attended, but they did not purchase my artwork that night. Complete strangers did. Her friends accounted for maybe 5% of total attendance. She was jealous of my talent, success and happiness.

A former Narcissistic friend did not like seeing me happy and prosperous a few years after my divorce and recovery. She made several comments about me being “happy” but did not appear to be genuinely happy for me. I worked very hard to recover and rebuild my life by being financially smart and by putting my “need to fix things” into remodeling an old foreclosure home. It came out beautifully!
She would often stop by on short notice with friends and want to show off my house like it was hers. I became uncomfortable with it. She made many bad decisions and spent money frivolously. She came and told me one day she was thinking of refinancing her house again to pull more money out. This was a house she inherited free and clear from her Grandmother. She had just done the same thing less than a year before and two years before that. I told her I thought it was financially a bad idea as it would add more fees and time into the mortgage. She got angry and snarled at me “well I don’t have a trust fund or rich parents to bail me out”

. I quickly reminded her that I had neither of those things but chose to work my ass off for everything I had. I also reminded her that she’s been handed a valuable home with no mortgage and in 5 years she pulled nearly every penny out of it and had nothing to show for it. She didn’t “need” the money, her husband paid their bills. She just didn’t want to go back to work so she could keep up with the Jones’s. It was very clear to me that she was quite jealous.

My Narcissistic mother also took an issue with my new home and happy, peaceful life far away from her. She told me on the phone one day “You haven’t had a difficult life. It’s been so much harder for me than it’s been for you”. I lost it! I told her “don’t you dare presume to know what my life has or hasn’t been.” It was clear my own mother was jealous of me. She didn’t pay for my house. I didn’t win any lottery. Yet her statement was so ironic as it was her Narcissistic behavior and that of my brother that literally conditioned me to accept abuse which created the most painful and difficult situations I’ve had in my life.

Narcs cannot stand to see others successful, prosperous, happy, in love or recognized. Rather than look at how hard you work or your natural talents, they bring you down by attributing your success to total fiction and lies they tell themselves and others to make themselves feel better!