Jehovah's Witnesses Straight Talk - Forum/Blog

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Lori Green
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Studied at Social and Behavioral NormsWed

Do narcissists know they hurt people?

The answer is, yes, they know, but this is the clincher, they don’t care. The reason they don’t care is because it’s a means to an end. People are objects from which to extract attention, energy, and resources from in order to stop them emotionally imploding and being annihilated by the big black hole inside that is their dead and dysfunctional screaming Inner Being.

You may want a narcissist to care, but they don’t.

Lying, manipulating, scheming, controlling, and abusing are all methods by which a narcissist attempts to regulate narcissistic supply, which is the flow of resources needed for them to keep feeding their fictional false self in order to maintain a charade of believing that they’re superior and significant.

The narcissist’s false self, the ego is attached to a system of separation and lack. The narcissist deeply believes that there’s not enough for everybody. So unless I win and you lose, I’m not going to get my share of this stuff.

To a narcissist who is disconnected from source, others, and oneness, there is no concept of win-win. It’s them against the world, which includes you.

The narcissist therefore does not have the capacity to care about you or care about that they are doing is wrong. To them, it’s right. It’s a means to an end.

And if you try to hold a narcissist accountable and get them to care and understand what they are doing, then you will see the three-ring circus. The unraveling of the personality, which is all of the deflections of defense mechanisms that literally make your head spin and feel like you’re trying to deal with an angry five-year-old who is acting delusional in an adult’s body.

And you will see that the narcissist will do anything to try to maintain the version of themselves in life that they’re firmly invested in, which is, “I am superior. I’m above reproach. How dare you question the false self’s actions? You are wrong. I am right. And I don’t give two hoots about you. This is all about me and what I’ve decided is mine.”

Everybody behaves in a certain way as per their belief systems. What are belief systems made up of? The emotional experiences and programs that you’ve inherited from your ancestors that was impregnated into you by your environment, your childhood, further relationships, and so on and so forth.

A narcissist believes that their True Self is not functional and cannot have its needs met.

Therefore, they assigned a False Self to be in charge. How a narcissist really feels about themselves at a True Self level is as per the defunct self-divorced and discarded inner True Self being.

A narcissist really feels like an empty vessel of defectiveness and unlovableness, and that they can never belong on their own merits in life. It’s kind of like a fish in a fishbowl looking at life and feeling like it can’t be a part of it.

The narcissist is deeply wounded, insecure, and forever battling feelings of insignificance. This self-disgust is projected onto others who are then attacked, abused, and mined in order for the narcissist to pathologically and psychologically try to annihilate the part of themselves that they hate.

This is why a narcissist treats others horrifically. Does the narcissist realize this? No. Why do they not realize why they’re doing this? Because they are not prepared to meet their Inner Being and deeply do the deep inner recovery work of releasing and reprogramming the trauma in order to bring the True Self back to life and wrestle themselves from out from under the grip at the self-annihilating ego.

They are not prepared to bring themselves back to sanity. A narcissist is deeply unconscious and trapped in the cycle of attaching to people and things, sucking them dry, destroying them, then having to move on and keep doing it all over again.

Just as a black hole in space keeps gobbling up everything in its path, but is still going to remain as a black hole.